


Retrouvailles

by Meg22591



Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: Angst, E/O reunion, F/M, Friendship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-08
Updated: 2016-06-08
Packaged: 2018-07-13 01:07:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,085
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7131860
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Meg22591/pseuds/Meg22591
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Retrouvailles - The happiness of meeting again after a long time.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Retrouvailles

**Author's Note:**

> Characters are not mine, simply this version of events in my head.

Turning the corner into an unfamiliar squad room, Elliot Stabler takes in his surroundings. Everything is so different from the last time he set foot in the 16th precinct that he actually glances back at the big lettering on the wall to make sure he's in the right place. "Special Victims Unit" it reads, so yes it appears things have been altered somewhat.

It's disorienting, to say the least, as he walks slowly past the desks towards the captain's office. New faces are everywhere. Funnily enough Elliot always liked to think back on this place exactly how he left it, but he guesses that if he was moving on, it's only right that the squad did too. It's a sad nostalgia, and he almost regrets his decision to come back here, but then he sees her. Well, catches a glimpse, more like, through the partially closed blinds of the office door. She appeared from the interrogation room to the right and just as quickly left his sight as she moved to sit at her desk.

His breath catches in his throat. His palms are suddenly sweaty and he isn't sure he can face her now, not after all this time. What could she possibly want to hear from him after 5 years? But, no, he resolves, he's been going over this apology in his head for days and he isn't going to chicken out now. She deserves more, just like she deserved more then. If she ignores him, screams at him, hits him even, she'll be justified. And anyways, at least he can say he tried.

Elliot swallows thickly before raising his fist to knock gently on the glass. A moment passes before her voice filters through the door. 

"Come in"

He cracks the door open enough to step into the room but doesn't move any further. She's got her head down, her brown locks spilling over her shoulders as her hand moves quickly across a page in front of her. Elliot feels like he takes in all the similarities and differences in her at once. She's wearing glasses now, they somehow suit her just perfectly, and her attire is no longer as laid back as it had once been. She wears a cream colored blouse (which hasn't changed) and a navy blazer. Her hair is a touch lighter and a few inches shorter, but the style is all off. No longer is it set in soft waves with a feathered bang. It's parted down the middle and curls slightly at the bottom, but he likes it. Her ever evolving hair styles have always amused him and this one feels age appropriate. He can't see much of her face, but he can tell she's got a few lines around her eyes he's never seen before. She's devastatingly beautiful.

"One minute" she says; a finger held up to stall him. 

Elliot takes another half step and closes the door behind him for the privacy he feels they'll need. It gets her attention and she looks up over the rims of her glasses and their eyes lock. 

Neither one of them speaks for what feels like a full minute, but she slowly removes the glasses from her face in what appears to be astonishment. And that's his cue. He clears his throat discreetly. 

"Olivia"

His voice sounds strained, even to him and he wills himself to get a grip. This is not about him, he reminds himself. 

Her eyes flicker for just a moment and a glaze comes over them before she blinks purposefully and her gaze hardens. 

"What are you doing here?" She deadpans.

Here goes nothing. "I came to see you", he pauses to check her reaction. Her mouth is hard line; her brows lift as if to say "AND?" 

"I came to apologize. For the way I--"

She cuts him off. "There's really no need, Elliot. None of that matters now. So unless there's something else, I need to get back to work" 

"Liv-"

"DON'T....call me that", she grounds out. "You don't get to come in here and act like nothing happened. What do you want me to say? That all is forgiven and everything's okay? That's what this is about, isn't it? Your damned Catholic guilt?"

He should have known she'd hear none of this. She's always put him in his place before and it seems she hasn't lost her edge without him. The fear that she might not have needed him at all claws at his chest so he tries again.

"No, I didn't--I just needed--I thought about you all the time--"

Fuck, this was not coming out well at all. All of that painstaking rehearsal for nothing. His words are caught in his throat and he's coming to the realization that nothing he could ever say will make up for years of abandonment. And that would have been bad enough had abandonment not been all Olivia's known her entire life. He curls his hands into fists and looks down at his shoes for answers. 

A loud sigh emanates from her mouth. "Look, I'm sure you had your reasons. But the truth is, Elliot, I gave up trying to guess what they were a long time ago. I've moved on"

He looks back up at her face and she's relaxed back down. She gives him a tight lipped smile. "It's like I said, there's no point anymore"

Her eyes subconsciously flick to a framed photo on her desk and Elliot can just make out two adults and a small child. It hits him harder than he expected. Of course it's only fair that she's finally found some happiness, but all those years as her only source of comfort leave him feeling jaded. 

He licks his lips and gestures at the photo. "You have a child?" He asks. He can hardly keep the surprise out of his voice. 

Her lips turn up into the first real smile he's seen on her in longer than he can remember. Her eyes light up in pride and love and it's the most beautiful she's ever looked. His heart aches in his chest. He wasn't here. He wasn't here for any of it and yes, he admits (at least to himself) that the guilt is overwhelming. But he can't ruin her moment so he smiles back, happy for her.

"His name is Noah" she says, running a finger over the glass where his little face smiles out at her. "He's almost 4 now. It's a long story, but the adoption went through 2 years ago"

She hesitates for a moment, then picks the frame up and stands from her chair, staring at the picture silently. Finally, she sighs lightly and rounds the desk to walk to him, holding it out in offering. 

He can swear his hand is shaking when he takes it from her; her sudden proximity catching him off guard. He looks at the boy that's made her a mother at last and can tell from his exuberant expression that he lacks for nothing. He always knew she'd be great. And with the child's dark eyes and hair, he looks like he could be biologically hers. 

But the distraction of Olivia with a child in her arms quickly disappears when he identifies the man in the photo. His eyes scrunch in disgust just for the memory of the man alone, but then it dawns on him what it all means and he looks up at her neutral expression. 

She doesn't shy away from his questioning stare, but she isn't going to offer up the explanation either it seems. 

Elliot gives his head a subtle shake, his mouth opening a bit in confused speechlessness. All he gets out is a whispered "Tucker?....and...you?"

Olivia's eyes cast down when she gives a jerk of a nod. He barely gets an irritated "why??" to pass his lips when she holds a hand up to stop him.

"Don't even start, El" she says, snatching the picture back and returning it to its rightful place on her desk. She remains standing though, both hands laying on the surface of the wood as she leans forward with a glare. "I don't really think I should have to explain myself to you"

His hands land on his hips as he attempts to control the anger rising inside of him. How can she be so blasé about this? With everything they've been through at the hands of that fucker, now she's INVOLVED with him?? The word makes him choke with righteous indignation. 

"No, but I sure as hell know who does!" he exclaims. To hell with staying calm. That son of a bitch rattled their cages for years, arrested her for murder, caused his resignation and then moves in on her once he's gone?! His breathing is heavier now and Olivia gives him a knowing look; a familiar look. It's one he's seen countless times in the past, usually when she was about to take him down a notch and save his career. 

He's raging on the inside but outwardly, he's still as a statue. 

"How did he do it, huh?" 

Liv blinks in astonishment. "Excuse me??"

"How did that son of a bitch get his hooks in you? Did he threaten you or-or--"

It's seconds until she's back in front of him, a finger pointed in his face. "THAT would be none of your business! And you've no right to talk about him"

His hand snatches out before he can stop himself, and he wraps his fingers around her wrist, startling her. But he's too far gone in this thoughts about that scum being with his partner, HIS liv. "Like hell its not my business. That man--"

"'That man' has done more for me than you ever did" she says, jerking her wrist free. She steps back a few feet and then sighs loudly, her fingers running through the side of her hair. "We're way passed all that. Why can't you just be happy for me? I finally have some semblance of family and you are just determined to shit all over it aren't you?"

Her eyes cloud over once again and suddenly some of the anger drains from his body. She looks so disappointed in him and that's not what he intended to do when he came here. He just can't wrap his head around the idea that Olivia is actually dating the enemy. It feels like a betrayal of everything they once were. United. Loyal. Partners....for better or for worse. 

He unclenches his jaw and meets her eyes. They're begging him to drop it, to understand, to support her the way she always had for him.

"I'm sorry" he says, "I AM happy for you Olivia"

He walks to her and pulls her hand into his. "He really makes you happy?"

One side of her mouth turns up in a small smile. "He does. It's different now. He's...changed. And so have I."

Elliot finally accepts defeat. This was far from what he ever would have imagined. Of all the assholes and losers she's dated, it had to be the one he detests the most. But it isn't his life and he isn't a part of hers anymore, and it's his fault. He really does have no right. "Okay" he says "then I'll try....to understand. I never meant to upset you, I'm just not very good at all this"

Olivia actually lets out a chuckle. "Yes, I remember that quite well" she says, "so....truce?" She holds her hand out as if to shake, and they share a moment looking at each other. But he doesn't accept her handshake, he wraps his arms around her because he has to feel her close, just one more time. 

Her arms stay at her sides for an awkward second, but he feels her relax into him and slide them around his back finally embracing. He doesn't know if this small concession is enough to earn her back, but he hopes its a start. He presses his face in closer to her neck and inhales the scent of her, so calming and familiar that he wants to cry with relief. Instead he forces himself to pull away and she gives him a warm smile, stays silent.

"Goodbye, Liv" 

She doesn't yell at him for using her nickname and as he turns to let himself out she replies with a hint of hope in her voice. "Bye, El"

Fin.


End file.
